


No Matter What

by tatterwitch



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Asexual Castiel, Bisexual Dean, Love Confessions, M/M, there really aren't enough ace!cas fics tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-04
Updated: 2015-09-04
Packaged: 2018-04-19 01:00:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4726835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tatterwitch/pseuds/tatterwitch





	No Matter What

Cas can’t believe that this is really happening.

After all, it had only been a few months since he and Dean had finally started being “official”. 

It’d consisted of Dean finally admitting to Sam that he liked men…Well, not just any men, Castiel specifically. Dean had been a complete mess of nerves for the days leading up to the conversation with his brother. 

Unsurprisingly, Sam had been more than supportive of Dean. Cas had known that he would be. Sam was a good man who loved his brother. After all, one’s sexual preferences did not define them. 

Yet, for his knowledge of that fact, Cas still felt…anxious.

Even after sexual encounters, he’d never particularly enjoyed the actions. He wasn’t ‘frigid’. He just didn’t like sex. He preferred other means of intimacy. 

But sex was something Dean enjoyed greatly. Dean had always been open and talkative about his sex life and lauded the wonders of orgasm. 

Cas did enjoy cuddling with Dean. He liked holding his hand and lying beside the hunter while he slept at night. He liked sitting beside him at diners, their knees pressed together and hands intertwined beneath the table. He even liked kissing, in a way. It was another sort of intimacy and it did feel nice, sometimes. 

Yet Dean had always made sure that, whenever any sort of sexual intimacy was initiated, that Cas was comfortable.

Dean was always so open and giving. It never failed to make Cas feel inadequate and undeserving of him.

Castiel wanted Dean to have the things he enjoyed, even if Cas wasn’t sure that he’d actually like participating in them.

One night, after a particularly long hunt, the two of them fell into bed together. 

Dean tangled his fingers in Cas’ hair as their lips lazily moved together. Dean’s lips were soft and plush and Cas thought that this wasn’t so bad. Maybe he could do this for Dean.

But then Dean’s hands started wandering. 

Cas tried to keep his mind distracted by the kisses. He really did.

Dean pulled back suddenly, breath falling heavy across Castiel’s cheeks and swollen lips. His brows were drawn up, worry lines forming on his forehead. 

“Cas, you okay?”

Castiel swallowed, trying to will his body into some sort of pleasurable state. 

“I-I’m fine, Dean. Y-you can continue.”

But something in Cas’ tone must have given him away. Or maybe it was something in his body.

Dean frowned, feathering the pads of his fingers over Castiel’s cheek and jaw.

“Cas, man, you’re clearly not into this. Is something wrong? We don’t have to do this, you know? I can wait. Hell, we don’t ever have to do anything. I-I’m just happy to have  _you_ , Cas.”

Cas felt his throat get tight. His eyes pricked and his breath stuttered.

“Dean, I don’t-I’ve never-Sex is-” Cas’ words just wouldn’t come out right. He took a shaky breath. “I-I am asexual, Dean.”

A swirl of confusion appeared in those green eyes. “What does that mean?”

“I don’t care for sexual intercourse.”

Dean blinked, going completely still for a moment. Castiel could practically see the wheels turning in his brain. Suddenly, Dean’s arms dropped and banded tightly around the angel’s body. 

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner? I wouldn’t have tried anything if I knew you were a-asexual? Is that what it’s called? Cas, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or do anything you don’t like.”

“You’re always talking about sex and how much you like it, Dean. I didn’t want you to lose something you enjoyed so much. I thought that, maybe, you wouldn’t want this, wouldn’t want me anymore.” Cas’ voice was low and quiet.

Dean made a wounded sort of noise and pulled Cas even closer to his chest.

“You dumbass. We weren’t having sex before and I practically panted after you. I’ve liked…loved you for a lot longer than I’ve wanted to have sex with you, Cas. I’m not completely stupid. Sex does not equal love and the other way around. If sex isn’t your thing, that’s cool. You are more important to me than sex, Cas. Ain’t nothing gonna change that. Ever.”

Cas blinked away the accumulated moisture in his eyes and gave Dean a watery smile.

“Really?”

Dean rolled his eyes. 

“Really.” He leaned closer, nose bumping Cas’. “I love you, Castiel.”

Warmth saturated his chest as his lips split into a huge grin.

“I love you, Dean.”

Dean leaned closer, before pausing, a blush creeping over his cheeks.

“We, uh, I can still kiss you, right? Is that okay?”

“Yes, Dean. I am quite partial to your kisses.” Cas meshed his lips with Dean’s, absorbing the hunter’s smile into his own.


End file.
